December 7, 2010

Up for interpretation

We went to a friend's house for dinner the other night and this friend had prepared a ten course meal for us.  Seriously decadent.  I, however, only ate multi-colored, steamed celery with a side of red maple leaves as a salad. 
Realizing that my dinner was not very filling, I went home and baked some gluten-free bread.  However, when I went to take the bread out of the oven, the loaves had turned into red jell-o.  I was so ticked, but looked at the clock and realized that I better scoot or I'd be late for the high school varsity football team tryouts. 
I showed up for tryouts just in time and blew the socks off the coaches--I was fast, very fast.  The offensive coordinator was so impressed that he gave me tickets to Disneyworld.  Sa-weet!  And then--ba ba da ba!--came the moment when the head coach posted up the roster of those who made the team. 
Just as I about made it to the front of the line to see my glorious name up as 1st-string wide receiver, something shot through me like a bolt of lightning: the realization that I had given birth to a baby girl a week ago.....and that I couldn't remember even try breastfeeding her since her birth.  Um, have I fed my baby AT ALL since she'd been born!?  I couldn't remember.  Surely, my husband hadn't thought to give her a bottle of formula at all this past week!?!  Oh my goodness, my baby has been starving for a week: I am officially the worst mom ever!  And that is when my alarm clock went off.


The Wilson Family said...

HAHA!! I have the super weird dreams when I am pregnant too, they make absolutely no sense! I always wake up in a panic.

Crystal said...

I had no idea where you were going with that!! I remember those really strange dreams too!

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