September 3, 2010

A better Me for a better Them

Despite getting the amount of sleep on our vacation that is reminiscent of Kenadie's colicky days, 
I have somehow come back rested enough from my life to jump back into it with new resolve to be a better mom & wife and to put that resolve into action.
I have just had the pleasure of spending two amazing, fun weeks with these two amazing individuals....

Being away from home, work, and the everyday routine of our lives has helped me to focus more on what a fun, hilarious, kind, and serving person my Garrett is.  I really cannot imagine that a more perfect man could exist for me.  He studies hard, keeps us healthy, watches Kenners, gives me my "girls' nights out", cleans and cooks, works hard in his church calling, is always concerned for "how I'm doing", and the list goes on.  He is simply wonderful in too many sappy ways for me to write in a blog post.  How did I get so lucky!?
I have also had two weeks to take in what a wonderful little girl I have in my Kenners.
As someone pointed out to us while at Bear Lake, "Your one child is as busy as our three children combined!"  
She is non-stop busy (like the Energizer Bunny!).  She is talkative, opinionated, determined, and vivacious.  She isn't easy, but her personality is so bright, so fun, so entertaining that I wouldn't change a thing about her.  I have often thought how lovely it would be to have an easy-going, chill child, but then I think of how much she teaches me and stretches me to grow as a mother and as a person and I realize that not only is she exactly what I need, but I really couldn't want for a more awesome kid for all the joy she brings into our lives.

....with a greater appreciation for what an incredible family I've been given, I am more determined to be the best Me that I can be for them because they so deserve it
So, here are a few things I have been doing this past week to try and make my home a happier place:

  1. Making sure that we are sitting down together to eat dinner formally (Kenners has even started to fold her arms during the prayer--cutest thing ever!).  I've always been pretty good at the making dinner part, just not the sitting-down-at-the-table-together part.  :)  So this is my new goal for us!
2. Reading scriptures together every morning (even though Kenners gets bored halfway through and toddles off to find a toy).  I decided that I needed to stop using "Kenners doesn't understand the scriptures yet" as an excuse to not read scriptures together....
3. We have set up babysitters for dates and are committed to going out at least twice a month.
4. Through painful consistency on my part, Kenners surrendered to holding my hand yesterday while she walked rather than have me hold her screaming all the way.  (Kenners main desire in life is to RUN free and as far away as possible wherever we are).  Painful consistency has also seen her go one meal so far without throwing her food and/or massaging it in her hair (progress!).
5. Instead of bombarding Garrett with my problems, my stress, and my frustrations of the day when he walks through the door after a long day at school, I am biting my tongue and making it a point to verbalize more appreciation and concern for his day, his feelings, his stress, and his exhaustion.
6. I am soliciting some help and ideas on how to improve myself for my family by reading the following books (which I am loving and highly recommend!):
"The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands" by Laura Schlessinger
"Everyday Parents Raising Great Kids" by James D. MacArthur

 One week of these small changes/improvements on my part, and: Surprise!
  Our home as been about twice as pleasant this last week as it was before we left home for vacation.
There is much more closeness and kindness between Garrett and I, Kenadie has actually been a lot milder and willing to listen and submit (even though daily tantrums are still the norm), and in general, there is a greater feeling of love and unity in our home.  What a difference!

I have had the tendency to blame Kenadie's challenging nature and personality, Garrett's crazy school schedule, and my busy schedule as the reasons for our family's weaknesses, and ya know, it was getting us nowhere!
  Just imagine that most of the things that annoy me or the things that I think are lacking in our family areall things that I can control and change by unifying our family, being a more consistent parent, and being a more loving wife! 
I am realizing that I have the power to create positive changes in my home and with my family no matter what.
And I'm going to take this little fire that has been lit under my hiney and keep working to be better for my two favorite people.


Laura said...

You ae such a good woman! I just had to say, I do love "The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands." THat lady has some great insights :)

Claire Christensen said...

A better home life always starts with "ME"! Always improving oneself is the key to a happier marriage and family life. But it is also true that the mother is the thermometer of the home! When she is happy things go a lot smoother(that is why my husband's goal in life is to make me happy, Haha). It makes me feel so good to hear those great compliments about Garrett because that means he has followed his fathers example. And yes Kenadie is perfect for you TWO. She is a doll!

Nicole said...

I've been there done that and I'm on the the next level!! :) Great job Holly!!!

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